third day of CNY today.. went to 3 of my uncles' houses.. went to the temple.. and had dinner at Thomson Plaza BK.. went back home to find that the lift was spoilt.. so had to climb up 14 floors to get back to the house to get my stuff out and go back to hall.

anyway. went back to hall.. bummed ard for a while then started thinking of the inevitable: the alumni dinner.. the reason why i dread it so much is cos my response has been low so far.. and well i really hate being a disappointment.. this being my 3rd yr in jcrc.. naturally i have expectations of myself and perhaps i'm putting pressure on myself for thinking this way.. but i think there are plenty of others watching me as well.. thus i have added pressure.. i'm superly frustrated at how things are going on now.. ARGH. sometimes i wish i could just give up halfway n forget about it.. but my conscience disallows it.. perhaps this is why the person in my position 2 yrs ago couldn't take it and sorta left.. but now.. i still have to live up to my own expectations and trudge on... really need the strength and the energy to do so..

*sigh* ok.. i'll leave the rest of the complaining to the next post.. hopefully i still have the motivation to post... *sigh* i'll see u guys soon.. tata

third day of CNY today.. went to 3 of my uncles' houses.. went to the temple.. and had dinner at Thomson Plaza BK.. went back home to find that the lift was spoilt.. so had to climb up 14 floors to get back to the house to get my stuff out and go back to hall.

anyway. went back to hall.. bummed ard for a while then started thinking of the inevitable: the alumni dinner.. the reason why i dread it so much is cos my response has been low so far.. and well i really hate being a disappointment.. this being my 3rd yr in jcrc.. naturally i have expectations of myself and perhaps i'm putting pressure on myself for thinking this way.. but i think there are plenty of others watching me as well.. thus i have added pressure.. i'm superly frustrated at how things are going on now.. ARGH. sometimes i wish i could just give up halfway n forget about it.. but my conscience disallows it.. perhaps this is why the person in my position 2 yrs ago couldn't take it and sorta left.. but now.. i still have to live up to my own expectations and trudge on... really need the strength and the energy to do so..

*sigh* ok.. i'll leave the rest of the complaining to the next post.. hopefully i still have the motivation to post... *sigh* i'll see u guys soon.. tata